I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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