She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
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