I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
