What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
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