I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
I party with great urgency now.
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