Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
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