She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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