Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
My pussy is not your playground.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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