I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Randomize
