I think i sorta joined a cult last night
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
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