Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
