i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
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