Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
Dude, I woke up in the kitchen, naked, with a blueberry bagel as a pillow.
Can I eat your pillow?
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Randomize
