ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
Boobs speak an international language.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Randomize
