You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
So apparently I’m into choking now
Randomize
