"it" just moved
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
