Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Randomize
