Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
