Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
Green mimosas i think yes
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
