i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize
