I can't watch pbs sober anymore
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Randomize
