They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
