i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
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