I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
