he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize