Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
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