Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Randomize
