Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
Me. At least after what I've been through.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Randomize
