I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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