I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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