There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
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