Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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