I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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