Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
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