so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
