did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
