My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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