He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
