So drunk, too bad you don't want this
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize