make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Randomize
