but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
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