we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
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