I don't think brook has ever known best
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Randomize
