why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Randomize
