Whatcha textin bout Willis?
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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