3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
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