how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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