Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Randomize
