just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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