Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
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