I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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