allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Randomize
